Compleat Redneck

Commentary from the boondocks. If it makes any sense, it is just by chance.

Friday, May 30, 2003
Sorry about the lack of posts. Blogger apparently hates us. Cletus says it is because we are part of the Axis of Weevil and Mr. Possum keeps saying bad things about Blogger. Bubba says that beats any of his Black Helicopter theories. Cletus says they are not his theories and there could be something to them.

Things have been pretty quiet around here. We have a had a lot of rain. We have plenty of water for a while but may be wishing we had some of this rain come August. The BBQ business is a little slow right now what with everyone getting out and doing their own cooking. Cletus has sold some wood to people who are smoking Boston Butts for fund raisers at churches and schools. He says it is good business for a prospective political candidate. Bubba says he isn't sure that people will connect the wood salesman with the candidate and if they do, it might not be a good thing.

Cletus is trying to figure out where he stands on the big tax increase. On the one hand, he definitely falls in the lower income segment, but then he owns some land and his overall taxes may go up. He has been talking to several people about it and so far hasn't found anyone who says they will vote for it. People are open to having their minds changed, but so far, they see a large pool of money for our legislature to give to their friends. The newspaper editorials are supportive of the Governor's plan, but most people don't think that they know much more than the rest of us. We haven't had one of them New York Times things at our local papers, but we know a lot of those folks and it isn't as if they could get jobs as rocket scientists.

Bubba says we are going to get the tax increase even if the legislature has to go into special session and override the voters. He is probably right although they would really like us to vote it in so they have cover when the next election comes round. All of the BBQ Emporium crew are going to wait for the specifics before we make up our minds, but so far it doesn't look good.

Tuesday, May 27, 2003
I was over at my friend's house on Saturday, the one who has the 66 Dodge Coronet showcar. Now you may not think of a 66 Dodge being a showcar, but you paint those big old flat sides black and shine up the chrome and you have one serious piece of automotive art, especially if the painter and bodyman is as good as old Glen Ray is. He insists that the paint and bodywork are full of defects and says that if it were a customer's car, he would redo it. He wins lots of awards at local car shows and gets a good bit of business from the people who see his car. It not only looks good, it goes real quick and fast. He has installed an overdrive so that he can get some gas mileage on the way to carshows and the thing has six gears. We calculated that it would do about 180 at 5000 RPM if it would stay on the ground. As it is, it goes from zero to 100 real quick.

He let me drive it!

Cletus is right jealous. He has been wanting to drive that car for a while and hasn't been invited. Now driving the "Damned Ole Dodge", as it is affectionate known by Glen Ray's long suffering wife, is a lot like driving a car at a dealer. He goes with you. Unlike a dealer, if you drive too easily, he let's you know. I guesstimate the 440 pulls about 500 Percherons and enough torque for a carlot full of Civics. As with a lot of big-engined, mid-60s cars, brakes were not a priority when it was built. It has smallish brake drums and no power assist. You need a strong leg to stop it.

I have had my favorite hill to check cars out on for years. It is a little traveled road with some nice curves. The big Dodge went up it real quick. It would be quicker with real brakes and wider tires. It broke the outside rear tire lose each time I applied power upto about 100 MPH in the turns and it didn't inspire a lot of confidence braking into the turns. Now I know that you are thinking that a 66 Dodge 440 wasn't meant to go around corners fast. That's what old Glen Ray said when I commented on its handling.

It may be years before I get to drive it again.